Amazing

I find it amazing sometimes....

....I was feeling overwhelmed and upset about a problem at work.  I go to work and it all seems to have figured itself out (for now)....

...Just one conversation with a friend who understands me is enough to rectify a week's worth of frustration....

....the horror and anxiety of going outside of my comfort zone always seems to work out well....

...I am well and truly blessed.

A random photo from the gym this morning.  I did a kettlebell exercise routine today during one of my classes.  Fun!!!

She said she usually cried at least once each day not because she was sad, but because the world was so beautiful and life was so short.
~ Brian Andreas

Hope

if you give a little love

All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.

~ JRR Tolkien

Ham

This evening I passed my ham radio technician's test.  Woohoo!!!  Guess the lost sleep and last 26 hours of training time were worth it.

Being away from home for two full days has been horrible for my nutrition.  I'm way over recommended calories every day and have been eating crap.  And I feel it too.  Going to hit the gym early tomorrow morning so I can get at least a little workout in before another full day at the academy.  

And snaps for Atticus as he was inside for over 14 hours today and no accidents!!!!!

Teach us to give and not to count the cost.

~ Saint Ignatius

Food. Again.

So, I've been cooking...

Sweet potato butter.   

Black bean balls.  (i.e. vegan meatballs).  Next time (and yes, there WILL be a next time), I'll puree the beans first, cause these fell apart easily.  It sounds gross but they were actually really delicious.  Today I had some with spaghetti.  Yum!

My first attempt at making dog food.  WAYYY too time consuming for the outcome - 18 cups of food.  Too bad Atticus eats 2-3 cups a day.  For now I'll do halfsies with his regular food.  He does love it though, today he picked out all his handmade food and left all his regular food in his bowl.

Applesauce and walnut dog biscuits.  

The most colorful fried rice ever.  Based off this recipe for edamame fried rice.  I used purple sticky rice (that I got at a farmer's market in PA), and along with green edamame, orange carrots, and yellow eggs, it was very very pretty.

"raw cookie dough bites"....  Made from almonds, walnuts, oats, etc.  Keep frozen.  Stay delicious.

Normal is an illusion.  What is normal for the spider is chaos for the fly.  
~ Morticia Addams

My so-called life

I often daydream about what it would be like to live a normal life...9-5 job in a place with cubicles, white picket fences, dinners at home, being generally unaware of crime and human nature, etc etc etc.  Would I be happy?  Would I be content?  Would I enjoy life?  

Its a rhetorical question, because I don't think I'll ever have that "normal life".  Some days that makes me very very sad.  I want to keep tragedy and knowledge far far away from my being.  I want a schedule and a social life and a general consistency that I can count on.  

But, really?  That wouldn't be any kind of life for me.  People tell me on an almost weekly basis that "I couldn't do your job".  I don't think its my job per se.  I think its all the benefits and backlash that go with it.  Yes, I got up at 4am this morning.  BUT, I have a friend who is ALSO up at 4am, and who I chatted with for 45 minutes because we could and we were both up.  How many "normal" people have that?  Yes, my coworker was murdered just because of the entity that he represented, BUT, I felt the immense support of the community and of my work family, and I still receive kind words from strangers when they see me wearing Tony's name.  

You take the good with the bad.  At least you learn to.

Part of this spiel stems from this week.  Its been a rough couple of days back.  Part of this also came to mind because as I was reviewing my bad day just now and looking for something, ANYTHING, positive, I realized my day actually started out great - talking with a friend at 4am - and I didn't even realize it.  When I really needed to talk to someone, someone was there.  

So, desk job?  No.  Not for me.  Not anymore.  

Ahhh...someone who doesn't judge.  And that's a shadow, not a black eye.

If you can't fly, then run,

If you can't run, then walk,

If you can't walk, then crawl,

But whatever you do,

You have to keep moving forward.

~ MLK Jr

Ending

My vacation is drawing to a close.  I have a training in Tacoma tomorrow (Friday), one more day off (Saturday), and then back to work on Sunday.  I think I'm ready to go back.  Get some routine back in my life.  It'll be a little while til that can happen though, as I have on week of dayshift, a short weekend, two days at Camp Murray (going for my HAM radio test!),one day off, a week of swingshift, a long weekend, and then I'm starting on the graveyard shift.

I'm pretty satisfied with my month long vacation.  I got a 2 week east coast trip in, I celebrated Christmas and New Years with my family, I got to see my brand new niece, hang out with my nieces and nephews, etc.

And while here, I started on my "year of accomplishments", already fixing things that have been on my to-do list for years.  My windshield is fixed (I made another appointment and had it fixed yesterday), Atticus is up-to-date on shots, I opened a new savings account, I started calorie counting (more on that one day), my hair is cut and donated, etc.

And I'm continuing with my gym-going, recipe making, dog hair-filled life.

My new favorite kind of sandwich - hummus & veggies.  

Oh yeah, and I made Pitas.  PITAS!!  Good filled with peanut butter or hummus and veggies.  Recipe from here.

Biggest fail ever.  Supposed to be a fudge dessert made with protein powder.  It was so horrible I gagged on the taste.  The only thing successful about this was that it succeeding in smoking up both my oven and my kitchen.  

More Hummus!!!  This time some edamame hummus from the veganstoner.  Well, edamame bean dip.  Good with chips or with vegetables.

Today I made three different kinds of veggies for my lunches this week - fried brussel sprouts, roasted potatoes with artichoke hearts, and I'm roasting butternut squash right now.

I had wanted to make some dog biscuits, but I've been in the kitchen all day and need a break.  Hopefully tomorrow evening.

So, thats about it.  I'm a little apprehensive about going back to work, but oh well.  Excited to go back to the graveyard shift.

If you're lost and alone
Or you're sinking like a stone
Carry on.
May your path be the sound
of your feet upon the ground.
Carry on.
~ Fun

USPS

Finally made it to the post office.  Happy (belated) birthday, Eliana!!!!

The unselfish effort to bring cheer to others will be the beginning of a happier life for ourselves.
~ Helen Keller